Saturday, May 9, 2009

Rain Rain and even more Rain

Cape Cod Weather Today: Rain. Rain. and Rain.
Officially, the forecast calls for light fog, 55 degrees and chance of afternoon thunderstorms.But they can't fool me It's raining out there. Again.

When the fog eventually lifts, something wonderful will be revealed.

The clouds will part. The sun will burst forth. It will be wonderful.

I did paintings of this concept in college. The fog was the present, but the future was that bright shiny thing hidden by the clouds. Eventually it would be revealed. (There was always a red sphere somewhere in the painting, representing me in that shiny future.)

I'm not sure eventually is here yet. I get glimpses of bright shiny things now and then, but I wouldn't call my life Bright or Shiny. Not yet. Not quite. So what am I waiting for?

Are my expectations too high? I know what I want to be when I grow up, but when will that be? Ever? Is "finding yourself" a lifelong struggle for everyone or only we confused few? Are there people who are just satisfied with what they have, with how their lives have turned out, or do you have to wait until the end to be able to evaluate it all and work out your tally sheet of pluses and minuses?

I had an actual exhibition of my paintings once, a few years out of college after I'd already left the world of advertising. It was held in Boston at a coffee shop/cafe kind of shop on Boylston Street, on the Berklee College of Music end of the street. I ended up selling one painting off the wall - well, the coffee shop did - to a visiting mathematician from Oxford, England. I like to think of that little painting sitting on an office wall at the university, having students stare at it while they wait to confer with their professor, their eyes traveling through the swirls, trying to find themselves in the painting.

Or at least find enough to make them smile. Hope you find something in your day today to make you smile as well.

...And to all those mothers out there reading this (not mine, since mine doesn't read my blog, she says) HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY! HAVE A GREAT DAY - YOU DESERVE IT.

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